I want to make you feel wanted...

Maybe one day I will finally fall in love with you.

I am sitting here wondering if things are finally coming into place. I remember the last time it happened I was so full of joy after a windy afternoon in front of that wall containing names of capital cities in Sunshine State thinking that the stars have finally aligned together. I remember sitting there dreaming together about visiting all those cities. But then it all fell apart, we all fell apart. 

But this time its been real slow, a gradual build up brick by brick sort of casual foundation. Maybe I am being too optimistic, after all, life has proven to me that I almost never get what I want. So please just don't rip it out of me, as long as you don't leave me alone crying on the stone cold floor at the end of day, I'll be fine.

I have been facing this world with courage I never knew I had. The hardships that have presented themselves have been absolutely crazy and I sometimes wished I could just run away. I am just hoping it will pay off one day. All will be good.

The amount of possibilities that exist is crazy. I can't wrap my head around the number of things and places I can see. I remember crying and clutching my heart on the hammock outside the house after rejection after rejection came. But I guess things happen for a reason, now I'm starting to think that my thing is to be free, to be able to choose to do whatever I want. Maybe this first step still requires me to be tied to the hip to my parents not being able to be independent but that buys me my freedom doesn't it? There is no clause insisting that I be at a particular place for 5 years after my graduation telling me exactly what I have to do. 

I am truly blessed. I am starting to see that bit by bit every day. 

Much love...

Wanted, Hunter Hayes

Photo credits:Durham University International Office Photo competition-King Leung Yung